A plea for boldness

Yes, even people on the mission field are human and face fears, confusion, and a lack of boldness. Prime example: yours truly…

This week I was Skyping with a friend. We had pretty much caught up on the surface level things of life and there was a lull in the conversation. I was pondering what topic to bring up next. There was a topic heavy on my heart that I wanted to share, but I didn't want to bring it up and dive into such a 'deep topic' so I just kind of ho-hummed around it and got to talking about something else…

What I should have said was this:

"I watched two documentaries last night. One was called the Virginity Trade and the other Girls of Phnom Penh. They horrified me and made the issues of sex trafficking become so much more real to me. I saw streets in those films that I walk down. Some of the buildings I recognized…for example, the ragged apartments across the street from where I sat watching the movie is well known as a place where sex can be bought easily."

And I should have told my friend the things that really horrified me about me about these films…

"Men admitted on film to intentionally saving up hundreds of dollars for the sole purpose of buying 13 year old girls' virginity. One man said in a rather direct, unsympathetic way that he knew buying the girl's virginity would hurt her the rest of her life as no man would want to take a non-virgin as a wife. Before I judge his actions, I must remember that he was raised in a society where it is ok, even encouraged, to think and act this way."

"Last night, I know that at least one girl somewhere in this city was gang raped because it happens to someone pretty much every night. She was beaten, raped multiple times, and after it all probably not paid a 'fair price' (if there were such a thing as a 'fair price' for rape)."

"One reason that rape and the purchase of sex is so rampant in this country is because pornography is so popular. It is a common form of entertainment for young men. A group of friends that was interviewed joked about how they watch porn then, after asking each other if they wanted to have sex, go and find a girl with the intentions of gang raping her."

"These girls are not prostitutes because they want to be. No girl wants to be a prostitute. And each girl has her own story as to what drove her to the point of selling her body. Some girls feel that there is no other way to help their poverty stricken families then to sell their virginity. Others girls have been raped and are then thought of as stained, useless, and outcast for the rest of their lives. No one else will probably ever marry a girl who has been raped; however, sometimes the man who raped her decides to marry her…a divorce later on looks better for the woman than being tagged as a rape victim."

I could go on and on…but I think you get the point. I wish I would have had the guts to share these things with my friend. Why am I scared to bring up topics like this with my Christian friends? How dare I pass up opportunities to share how they can be lifting these men and girls up in prayer? If I can't talk to people I know about these issues, how will I ever I tell my Khmer neighbor how Jesus loves her enough to die on a cross for her?

But alas…it isn't about me and my abilities or lack there of. It is about the Lord and His glory being spread on this earth. He will do it with or with out me. I will do nothing out of my own strength, but only through His Spirit in me.

So…I will pray as Paul does, asking "God to give me the right words so I can boldly explain God’s mysterious plan that the Good News is for Jews and Gentiles alike. I am in chains now, still preaching this message as God’s ambassador. So pray that I will keep on speaking boldly for him, as I should." (Ephesians 6:19-20)

Paul was in jail for preaching the Gospel and yet he was still preaching the Gospel. May the boldness of the Spirit pour over and into us, making us able to point out injustice for what it is. May the Spirit overpower all doubts and fears and empower us to be bearers of Christ's love in the midst of chaos and darkness.