“Our efforts to help the poor can hurt both them and ourselves.”
The book When Helping Hurts by Steve Corbett and Brian Fikkert defines three things that factor into our efforts to help ending up being hurtful.
The first is our skewed definition of poverty– We often just think of poverty as a lack of material possessions. The book defines poverty as brokenness of relationship…relationship with ourselves, with others, with creation, and ultimately with God. Some people’s brokenness manifests as material poverty while other’s brokenness, just to name a few, could manifest itself in workaholic tendencies, materialism, or self-centeredness. When poverty is defined this way, we are all poor. However, if we view poverty just as a lack of material possessions, we can tend to think that money alone can solve all the problems. But can money mend relationships?
The second factor is that the economically well off (most of the people reading this blog, I assume) can develop 'god-complexes.' This means we can easily and unconsciously begin to think that we have some sort of special anointing to decide how the materially poor could best benefit from our wealth. Satan does as good job of trying to hide these secret motives from us. The book challenges us to reflect on these questions:
“Why do you want to help the poor?…What truly motivates you? Do you really love poor people and want to serve them? Or do you have other motives? I must confess to you that part of what motivates me to help the poor is my felt need to accomplish something worthwhile with my life, to be a person of significance, to feel like I have pursued a noble cause…to be a bit like God” (pg 65).
If I'm honest with myself, I have had the same thoughts. At other points in life, I have felt a duty or commitment to the materially poor because of my economic situation. How off I have been…I have to continually ask for grace to accept and admit that I am just as broken as anyone else, it just might not be as evident on the outside.
The last factor addresses the feelings of inferiority the materially poor may feel. Our efforts can unintentionally communicate to the material poor that we are ‘better’ than them and give them the idea that they are inferior. They can feel shame shame and develop low self-esteem.
Picture for a moment a poverty stricken mother in Cambodia and her hungry children. The only option she sees for herself is to go to the market and beg off of foreign tourists. They see her dirty clothes and sad eyes and pity her; they give her a wad of cash. This makes her feel good—she can feed her kids for the day. It makes the tourist feel good—he can return to his hotel feeling as though he helped a poor woman feed her kids for a day.
But tomorrow she will still be poor. She will go to the market again and beg from another tourist. The cycle will continue day after day. She is happy to feed her kids for the day, but imagine how she feels about the fact that the only way she can feed her kids is by begging and looking pitiful? When a white person hands her money and says “God bless,” the message he might unintentionally be sending is "You are worthless. I don't believe you have the ability of caring for your family on your own, but I'm glad I can help you out!" She is not pushed towards a life of independence, actually quite the opposite. She is encouraged to give up on herself and believe the lies that she is worthless. I bet being a pitiful looking woman wasn’t her dream. But when you have no self-respect and are not seen and respected as a real person there doesn’t seem to be anything better to strive for. But what if someone built a relationship with her, helped her set up a stand to sell vegetables, invited her into a healthy church community…
“Our efforts to help the poor can hurt both them and ourselves.”
These are just my musings from the first few chapters of this book. Take them or leave them. I know that every situation cannot fit the cookie cutter mold answer, but I challenge you to reflect on the points presented. Do you believe this statement is true? And how does that affect your future interactions with the materially poor? What does it reveal to you about the brokenness in your own life?
this is a huge issue in missions. So glad to see you wrestling thru it, Kelsey.
Lots of important things to consider!! I think sometimes when we are “in the moment” we give because we feel that is all we have at that particular point in time to offer. So important for us to search out ways to help promote self-sufficiency and pride.
Empowerment changes lives.